Friday, April 24, 2009

' I Said, A Hip Hop The Hippie...'


Rapper's Delight was the first Rap song I heard in my life, and I loved it! It was back in the day...those good old days in Lagos, when music was music,(and every generation says this by the way) when I could dance, when life was simple...

We went to this party in Victoria Island, I must have been...oops, I was about to mention my age and I know some people have their calculators out...not that it matters! Anyway, they played this song and there were two friends of ours, good looking too, though everyone was fine then...or almost everyone, they had obviously rehearsed the lyrics, we later heard they brought the record from America when they went on holiday (no You Tube remember), anyway,these guys stood in the doorway,and when the DJ played this song,they just rapped and rapped and rapped alongside...I was tripped, and so was my little sister, Feyi...

It's no big deal to be at a party with your little sister, I guess...but this was a big deal, and I am going to tell you why... Feyi was kind of a pain, in those days. Like I've said before, we are four girls, I am the third, and the ages between the first three of us is close, but between Feyi and I, it's like a hundred years! If your adding machine is still out, and you know the year the song came out, and you also can guesstimate my age, then you all know Feyi was too young to be at this party. So...why was she there?

Before I give the details, you won't believe that I can't remember why I started writing this post...I know it has to be related to You Being Able To Do It, but since the gist is flowing, let me finish it first then I will try and remember...

Back to the party, and Feyi being there. At this point you all are wondering where my two other sisters were? They were also there, but they were, or pretended to be, quiet, gentle and generally good. Feyi, on the other hand was performing the duty she had been sent there to do by my Pop...

Having four girls could not have been easy for my father, especially as we were quite popular, so he devised a system so he could know what we were getting up to when we went out to parties, which in those days was not often, and always at the invitation of someone your parents knew or at least could check out. This system had my mother or himself chaufeurring us to and from the boogies, and Feyi...as the spy!
Her role was simple...we couldn't go to any parties without Feyi, and she in turn would watch who was dancing with who...if they turned off the lights and so on...she would then go back home and report to them, and get a pat on the back for a job well done...or so they thought!

Isn't it funny how even though you have been in a similar situation as someone else before you can forget how it feels. My parents had also been young, though in those days it didn't seem like it! They had also partied, or at least kind of, sang to Jim Reeves or whoever, and probably gotten up to all sorts. They must have had their own 'Feyi' in their respective families, and surely they devised a method to deal with the person...so why would it be any different for us?

I am not going to tell you how we got round Feyi, because we did, but I am going to tell you why we must be able to remember the past...to look back, and to apply those memories positively to current day situations.

Who are you mentoring today? When last did you take somebody outside your immediate family by the hand and agree to guide them? Have you looked back into your life lately to appreciate where you are coming from and compare it to where you are now? And most importantly is where you are now where you thought you would be at this age?

I have just remembered that it was Mentoring I wanted to write about, but It's All Good! I will leave that for another time...let's look at 'Are You Where You Thought You Would Be At This Age?'

Do this simple excercise, get a piece of paper, and write down if you can remember, the dreams you had when you were younger, let's say in your teens, when 'music was music'. What type of life did you imagine you would be living when you were your parents age (which is about now!)...are you living that life, and if not, why?

You need to re-assess your life today. You need to do a self audit. You need to get back on track. Now is the only time we know. It is never too late and it doesn't cost a penny. It starts with a thought, and thoughts are free! Change your thinking to change your life. You must succeed, because believe, it or not you owe it to your Creator, to your children, to your family, to your dependants, to all those who love you, and most of all to Yourself!

You CAN Do It!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

What Goes Up Must Come Down...



Physics was my worst subject when I was in secondary school in Nigeria.I did it from Form 3 to the first term in Form 5,before I was kindly'released',or advised as my father preferred to put it,or as I put it,kicked out of the class.
So if I didn't like it,and obviously didn't have the aptitude for it,why did I have to study it in school for two years...

My mother is from Trinidad,she got a scholarship when she finished school in Port of Spain,to study Physiotherapy at McGill University,Montreal,Canada.My father is from Nigeria,he got a scholarship after school in Nigeria to study Mechanical Engineering,also at McGill.They met,obviously,and they married..end of story right?No,just the begining actually,but that is for another day..back to Shade struggling in the physics class,and how it's related to their love story.

I am the third of four girls.The first two did all the right things,that is,they were school prefects,they were quiet,and most importantly...they were willing and able science students!

So where did I come from...that too is for another day!The long and short of it is, I dropped Physics five months to my exams,picked up Government,caught up with three years work in six months,and got an A1 in my O's..not bad for a blockhead...

However,over the years I realized that I had subconciously picked up alot of knowledge in my physics class...I also started being able to relate alot of the theories and laws to real life..it was only then that the subject began to make sense.

The Law of Gravity was my favorite..and not because I was so interested in it,but because our teacher always used to say'what goes up must come down!'In those days Biology was compulsory,I think,and that was slightly more interesting...with all the diagrams on anatomy...and so on..we could relate the law of gravity to the reproductive process..I need not say more!

There were all these laws...and we were taught that they were cast in concrete,and there were no exceptions to the rule,they were called Physical Laws.

Unfortunately,there was another set of laws,equally important,if not more so,that we were not studying in school,and that if we had,would probably have made a major difference to our lives... The Mental or Spiritual Laws.
Mental Laws or Spiritual Laws,as some people prefer to call them,and the Physical Laws together make up The Laws Of Nature.They are similar in that whether we believe them or not they are.It doesn't matter if a man falls from a ten storey building in China or in Burkina Faso,he will fall downwards...and hit the ground!

There are several Mental Laws:The Law of Attraction,The Law of Expectation,The Law of Control,The Law of Cause and Effect,The Law of Correspondence etc.
Alot has been written by different authors on these laws,and they are in fact the foundation of alot of religiously inspired teachings.

If this is so why then do most people not adhere to them in order to achieve their desired objectives?If what goes up must come down,as stated in the Law of Gravity,why is it difficult to believe that You Get What You Expect,and not neccessarily what you want,as stated in the Law of Expectation,or that You Are A Living Magnet,and you attract people and circumstances to you that are in line with your dominant thoughts,as stated in the Law of Attraction.

You are the most powerful transmission tower in the universe,and you must operate at a frequency that will bring everything you want to you!When you think positively,when you think about those good things that you want,when you become in tune,when you begin to focus your thoughts,you will become an energy magnet,and because all those things you want are made up of energy,they WILL be magnetically drawn to you!

The Law of Control says,you feel positive about yourself to the degree to which you feel you are in in control of your life,and you feel negative to the degree to which you feel you are not in control,or that you are controlled by some external force,person or influence.

Take control of your life NOW,empty your mind of old ideas and habits that are holding you back.Life is not a dress rehearsal.You owe it to yourself to be the best that you can be,and remember....

You Can Do It!

Monday, April 13, 2009

If It's To Be It's Up To Me!


Yesterday was such a beautiful day,the sun was shining and yet there was a cool breeze blowing,which is not unusual as we live by the beach.

This morning, I was woken up by the sound of coconut trees flapping,dogs howling,internal doors slamming...a storm is fast approaching...another beautiful day! Anybody can relate to these extremes in the weather(especially if you live in London!),but not everyone can understand that it is synonymous with life.

Life means different things to different people.To some it is exciting,full of opportunities,a joy to be a part of,and yet to others it is boring,monotonous,stressful and sad...but it doesn't have to be this way...

I remember my late teens and early twenties,a period when it is not unnatural to rebel,a period where everyone is to be blamed for all your travails...except you.

I remember feeling so angry and helpless.Other people's behaviour and decisions seemed to determine my reactions,my choices,my life...it wasn't fun,and it got me thinking...and think I did.

That was when my quest for the meaning and purpose of life began.That was when I began to wonder why some people were more successful than others.That was when I realized that wealth and formal education were totally unrelated.That was when I realized that so many people were just going through the motions of living,but were barely alive.That was when I started to read....and read..and read.

Man has never had so much access to literature on Success,Wealth,Life,Happiness etc.,and yet man has never been so poor,so in debt,so at a loss for what to do...and yet it doesn't have to be like this...but it will be like this until you realize that;you are the architect of your own destiny,you are in the driver's seat of your life,that you determine your present...and your future!

If It's To Be It's Up To Me!

Yes,I know,I know..this is such a cliche!But what can I do about that, when it's so true?
Read it again..If It's To Be It's Up To Me!

What does this saying do?It empowers you immediately.It gives you control of you.It reaffirms the belief that God is not arbitrary.It gives you hope.It let's you know that nature is neutral.It means that you are a storehouse of potential waiting to be released.It means it is not too late,no matter your age,or your circumstance to become all that you can be!

I can hear some people already..'yes Shade, it's all well and good','there's a recession','I live in England,it's not easy',I live in America,the system','I live in Africa,there's corruption,famine...'

These are age old excuses,and if you take the time to check,similar excuses have been made since before biblical times!

Start today!Take the following steps,and you will be on your way to the life you were meant to live!

*Get a pen and a piece of paper and write down all the things you want right now.Make sure you write them in the present tense,and put today's date on it.You must write,do not do it in your head!Do it today!
For example, 'I own a beautiful house in Tobago,by the beach',try and cut out a picture of such a house,and put it where you can see it!Trust me,it works!

*Write down where you are now,and what you need to get where you want to be.Do not be afraid to write,even if you don't have a red cent now!

*Determine something on your list that you can do today,even if it's only to read up on the Internet on a particular subject,and do something everyday towards attaining your goals.Once you start nature will rise up and come to your aid in ways you might not right now be able to envisage!

*Determine to think and speak only in positive terms.Keep away from negative people,negative news,and negative situations.Make a concerted effort to do this!

*Focus on what you have,and what is surely coming to you!

*Read!Read!Read!Read up on successful people,read articles on positive thinking,just keep reading and believe....

Whether the sun is shining or rain is falling in your part of the world right now does not matter,what matters is your attitude towards it.One way or the other it's a beautiful day!It just depends on how you decide to look at it...and the same goes for life.

Hold on firmly to the steering wheel of your life,take control and remember....


You Can Do It!